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Reply To: I will never understand men's dating behavior

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#107778
Anonymous
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Dear dreaming715:

You are welcome and thank you for your acknowledgements. This reminds me what my then therapist explained to me. He said two people are not always as close to each other; there is always motion: moving closer and away. Like planets he said. It makes sense as everything in motion, from electrons, atoms to planets. So must it be with people, always moving and that includes moving closer and away, closer and away.

I remember how anxious I used to get with every movement away, and this may be exactly the problem here- whenever there is that natural, unavoidable moving away, of a guy moving away from you, you get alarmed, as if the moving away means moving all-the way-away. Well sometimes this is what happens, but not all the time.

With this guy , his moving away did not mean moving all-the way away. It was part of the natural motion. So, next time he moves away, remember this time, the natural motion concept, the fact he moved closer. And expect it as it happens for you as well. Once you get close to him, even if he remains as close for a while, you will naturally move away, a response to stresses in life not related to him, could even be indigestion causing one to move away.

This is very clear to me now, my goodness, thank you for leading me to a better understanding of this motion principle in human relations.

anita