Dear Iphoenix,

Thank you for your kind and wise words.

I do understand their situation, I can put myself in other’s shoes, but the fact that they think that what they went through allowed them to say what they said and more importantly they believed I deserve same, no better, makes it difficult for me to forgive. I am terrible at forgiving people and I am not ready to do it, not yet. Anita and you were right, they will not hear me, thus I am not going to try and waste my energy on that. I need this energy for myself now and first time in my life I feel strong enough and ready to work on it and put myself first.
‘ but they will forever remain exactly where they are in this life but you can go forwards and live a happy life.’ Yes that is so true and this is one of the reasons why I am not upset about this situation anymore. I am more self-aware than they are ever going to be in their life. I will work hard to feel better and to learn that I am worth more than I feel at the moment, because I know I can change it and I am grateful for that.
Thank you for your book recommendation. You have encouraged me to look for relevant literature to be able understand my feeling better.
I hope you find peace in your life and like you said to that I am special, you also know that you are special too. Take care