Hi Aballa,

I read through all, whatever you have written and shared and I have few suggestions for you, which you may want to try:

1. If he contacts you again in any means or form, Tell him or respond to him upfront with a chit – A chit with big numbers on it – whatever you have spent for him so far….and tell him, He needs to pay it back first, only then you can initiate atleast a formal conversation with him.

There are 2 benefits here: If he agrees and pays, it will take time for him to payback, which gives the much needed break time for both of you, and you get your money back atleast.

2nd, If he is not paying you back, you atleast know, what he is after…since there is no price tag for love.. You did everything for him out of love and he took it for granted…So, you need to be upfront and strong atleast on the financial part, considering all the financial loses you have incurred with this relationship…

2. After reading everything, I personally feel, you are the one allowed kevin to treat you like this, it may be due to love, fear, insecurity or just pity for the one you love.. it happens.. but, YOU DON’T DESERVE TO BE TREATED THIS WAY, WHATSOEVER…PERIOD. Be bold, strong and hard enough, put your foot down and TELL him, that you need to be treated with respect in all ways, as he expects you to treat him, which you have already done almost every time…

3. After reading everything, I personally feel, everything you wrote was about how he behaved and treated you in certain situations, but, it doesn’t say anything on how you behaved in any given situation, how you responded, not reacted to him, how you communicated your love, hate or anger towards him… sometimes, we need to respond and sometimes we need to react, when we feel, we are being pulled down and not treated with respect, which we all deserve, even kevin is not an exception for this.

4. I think, he was trying to pass on his irritation, anger and helplessness to support and gather himself, on to you and you were accepting it as part of this relationship and most of the time it was out of pity and love..mixed emotions…

Be strong!! Be Brave!!! All it takes is a little bit practice and determination to be who we actually are and who we actually want to be..now that you are in singapore, he cant do anything to you even emotionally, until you allow him to do so.. cut the negative part on this behavior and focus on the positive part and make him understand the same.. sometime, you have to TELL.. sometime you have to make him FEEL.. That’s how this goes as far as I know..

Please pardon me if I’m wrong.. I wish you all success, happiness, love..and the strength to endure and be a WINNER…