Choccoffeewine,

There’s a lot of information here, so let me see if I understand correctly. The changes in the industry are forcing him to move to another city/state. So what would happen if he stayed? Would he be no longer have a job, or would he still have the same job but with a lower pay? The reason I ask that is because I feel that that is the most important question to your dilemma.

I understand your frustration, disappointment, and fatigue. It is completely understandable. I would be tired of moving as well if I were in your place, especially since you’re not always staying in the same state. If you were childless, then perhaps it’d be easier. However, as you said, you are the one being left to wander about trying to figure out the house, school, utilities, groceries, etc. Because of that, I can also understand the resentment. I’ve heard it said that the person who has to make sacrifices for the other ends up with resentment. I can see why that is true.

Could you perhaps get a part time job while the children are away at school? I think that would still leave you enough time to attend to them and pick them up from school.

I don’t think it is selfish of you at all to not want to relocate because the way I see it, you have been sacrificing yourself for his job since your first move. You have been the one who has repeatedly had to start over in the workforce, with friends, etc, while he has not really had to give anything up. Yes, he is the sole provider for your family, but moving is still a sacrifice you are making because you are uprooting your children and yourself all because of his job.

I did notice that there was no specific question in your post. What are your thoughts on the matter in regards to if you were to stay?