Last March my 14, almost 15 year old and his girlfriend broke up. Immediately afterwards, she started flirting with his best friend, who I happen to be friends with his parents, his mother in particular. His best friend began flirting right back. My son was overcome with jealousy. They would snuggle on the bus ride to away tennis matches. They go to a very small school, so this was in his face everyday, and they carried on without regard for him. He came up with all kinds of attempts to get her to pay attention to him, and to stop. He begged them to stop. He ended up threatening suicide to her, and she called me to let me know. But they kept on flirting and professing their attraction to each other. I tried a therapist for him, and she suggested that he let his friend know how he felt, hoping the “bro code” would go into effect. But it didn’t. My son didn’t go about it the right way. He had a snap chat conversation with his friend telling him he almost killed himself over her, and asked him to stop. Then asked him to just date her so they could get it over with and break up. He was so confused, and jealous and had nowhere to turn. He felt that no one was loyal to him.

The girl convinced him that he would have been jealous no matter who it was and that it made no difference that it was his best friend. I know that would not have been true. It would have been different had it not been his best friend.

Then, at the spring prom, the two were hot and heavy dancing and making out and my son saw it all. Like I said, it’s a very small school. He ended up actually crying at the prom, a 15 year old teen, crying because his ex girlfriend and his best friend were carrying on. 2 weeks later, a classmate had a party and tried to prevent my son from coming because the other 2 would be there together. My son said he was over it and the classmate then said, great, then come on. But he needed a ride, and the girls mother refused to give him a ride. The following night a bunch of teens went to see a teen band, and again the 2 of them were there, all over each other right in front of my son. Another parent told me what she saw and was astounded by what his best friend was doing to him.

Time went on and school let out for the summer. My son seemed to start having fun and made another friend who thankfully took his mind off of things, but still tried to be friends with his former best friend, who then seemed to kind of ignore him, or avoid him. And the mother, who I hung out with and talked to all the time never once contacted me over the summer. Now they are all back at school. My son seems to be doing fine, though I’m afraid he’s built a wall around himself. He is trying to be friends with the guy and the girl and says he has no feelings for her at all, and that he’s fine with the 2 of them being together.

But I am hurt that the mother never once contacted me over the summer. We are nothing more than cordial with each other now, and I have this resentment hanging over me. I cannot look at her or her son the same way, knowing how badly hurt and humiliated my son was at the time. The 2 do not appear to be officially dating, but clearly still carrying on, flirting, hugging and kissing. It’s as if they won’t “date” in honor of my son, but they carry on as if they are. I have to remain cordial, and I do not want to discuss with the other parent as she clearly doesn’t want to. My son will not let me talk about the situation with him at all. There’s a homecoming dance soon, and I’m so afraid it will bring up the old pains when my son has to witness them all over again. Is he really over it? Or did he just shove his feelings down because the girl manipulated him into believing that they’ve done nothing wrong.

How do I get over this horrible feeling of hurt and betrayal that I feel?