Thank you, Anita.

My therapy was helpful so far in helping me manage my relationship with my mother which was a source of stress to me before. I cannot “prove” that the therapy changed that, I can only observe that this aspect of my life has greatly improved since I’ve been seeing this therapist. Also, I was having a hard time accepting the possibility of having children and of getting married. I have since got married without too much anxiety and have decided I did want to have children, which I believe is what I always wanted but was afraid of.

These are big steps for me, because I was always worried I will not be able to make such decisions without suffering from constant doubts and pain.

However I do feel that the ROCD issue is rooted deeper than that and is probably my main issue, and that some of my life circumstances lately have probably contributed to the increased level of anxiety. So maybe it’s not surprising that we haven’t managed to solve it just yet.
Also I think I have been resisting the therapy quite a lot. My therapist hasn’t said this to me in these words but that’s what I conclude from things he says and from the somewhat stuck feeling we are both getting, I believe.

I like him because I feel that he is truly present and listens to what I say, and he also speaks more often than some therapists, I’ve been to others before and some of them hardly speak two words during a session, I do feel it is more helpful when the therapist responds to what’s being said. Also, I once saw him in possibly my worst “spike” ever, and I felt a lot better after speaking to him. Something in what he said helped me a lot that day and it was so precious and meaningful to me, because I was such a mess before seeing him.

It does help to share all of this with you, thank you for your kind presence.
And again, please don’t feel the need to respond to everything or at all, I don’t want to exhaust you:)