Dear Chau:

Good to read from you again, as always. Your experience climbing the mountains in Nepal is very valuable: when you felt danger, thought you were going to die, you wanted your then partner to be with you. And this is what I get from this experience: the more alone we are as children, the more scared we are, and the deeper our need for a parent to comfort us, to be there with us. For a child, being alone feels like great danger, because a child is physically depending on an adult for care taking and protection.

A child growing up (emotionally, if not physically) alone, carries this attachment to adulthood. All adults need others, but a lonely child grows up to need others more desperately than a child growing up with a togetherness with parents.

You asked for me to wish you luck- I wish you luck and courage. When you feel scared, remind yourself that you can take care of yourself now, protect yourself. You don’t need another to feed yourself, dress yourself, plan your day, make choices, manage your day, you can do these things. The more you trust yourself to take good care of yourself, the less fear you will feel, and the less desperate the attachment to others.

Do post again, before your travel and anytime otherwise.

anita