Dear Emelle:

You wrote: “My question is really about living day-to-day in a less than ideal situation”-

My understanding is that you decided to live with your husband as co parents but you want to learn to have more peace of mind in this living situation. You wrote: “I need to work on accepting the situation. I have some anger and resentment that my husband is not committed enough to our marriage to be willing to work on things.”- clearly you did not accept the situation yet and your anger needs to be attended to, otherwise, there will be no peace of mind living with him in any context, is there?

You wrote: “Recently, we took a short vacation with our daughter, and I got my hopes up that he might be motivated to behave differently. That was not the case, and I’ve struggled with increased pain and anger since our return”- you still hope for a loving, happy marriage.

To understand better and hopefully to offer anything of value, I ask: what are those behaviors on his part that you are referring to, what is it that he was not willing to work on in the context of the couple therapy you attended?

anita