You can’t change your sister however you can continue to work on yourself

You indicated that you must fight to get some peace which suggests to me that you’re aggressively engaging in the issues with your sister.

It is of course an irony that one fights for peace. You can fight as in go to war for peace but wars come at a huge cost to oneself and the lives of others. Or you can fight to find inner peace.

There is a hermetic riddle: As above so below, as below so above. As above so below – we allow ourselves to be influenced by outward factors. As below so above – we influence our outer experience by becoming the change we hope to see. Both truths are at play in every moment. The person at peace is awake to how they are influencing and being influenced. It is possible though not the goal (you can’t change others) that by finding inner peace that you influence your sister to become more conscious of how her actions affect those that love her. I know probably not what you wanted to hear

You also said that “Things always seem easy for everyone else”. I can guarantee you that you are correct in using the word “seems”. We can never know another’s thoughts, experiences, or troubles. The path to peace means letting such judgments go and stopping the comparison we make based on what we imagine other experiences are. Peace exists in the moment that you allow it to exist.

Lastly Hate is a strong word and words hove power so I might challenge you with the idea that you can love a person and still not like what they do. You can love and still hold them accountable for there actions. (it would not be love if you didn’t). This change of perspective may sound as if is semantics but I think its more then that. Only in Love will lead to the experience peace that you hope for.