hi

i came here last year with some issues and this time also I need some insight to help me judge better .

Back ground story

I was dating a guy for past 6 years and we were very committed to eachother .

Others our friends and wells wishers had a perception that I deserve much better guy then him . I’m smarter ,better ,much better qualified blah blah nonetheless I was very much in love with him so I never thought that way .

He was an ideal boyfriend, he cared , loved and never cheated but at same time  he was bit narrow minded and possessive and it was very hard to communicate with him since he has very rigid opinion .I cheated on him and confessed because I was so sad that I kinda went in a depression state .After lot of crying and talking he forgave me .

But problem was that he never told about our relationship to his parents ,since he thinks they will never accept me for him.

In this 6 years there were many occasion I told me to talk to them but he told me clearly he can’t but he always said he loved me and will never leave me .

So deep inside I had a fear that this is not going to work as he is very dependent on his family .

He kept assuring me one day things will work ,He never met any girl his family was suggesting nor he showed any intrest but also he didn’t clear his wish to get married to me .

last year ,I put him in a  lot pressure to take the matter in hand because it’s been long so he said he can’t and broke up with me.It followed a lot of crying ,yelling and other drama but after few months we were talking again .

But he would still say , he can’t say if he can get married to me but at same time he wouldn’t want to be with anyone else

amidst of all these things , I met a men . He confessed his feelings for me .First I wasn’t physically attracted to him but we became friends and I told him all the story . He was a constant support agonist him,my parents who were also making my life difficult .

this new guy is ideal guy everyone wishes for , independent ,successful ,caring , loving , traveller and above all he loves my parents as if they were his own .He never encouraged me to break up with him but always told that if there is a bleak chance of us getting together ,he will never come between . Though he loves me but he is mature enough to handle .

while we are still friends and some feelings deep side he helped me in my career and without 1 year ( you can say I sort of became a célèbrated personality ) in my town .Eventually I feel in love with him and his goodness and we can talk about anything in the world . Now I even find him physically attractive may be its my feelings .

now my earlier boyfriends wants me to be ready as he is going to talk to his parents and he is pretty sure he will be convinced .

All my friends tell me , why wasn’t your boyfriend so sure when you were struggling ?I also feel the same, as I’m right now a person anyone would like the idea to be with me .

Young ,smart ,kinda pretty, very successful . But at the same time I also know my boyfriend – that his feelings at one point of time were genuine just that he was bit spineless.

So today I told my bf that’s it’s not going to happen between us. I can’t act as if nothing happend and start loving his family . So it’s kinda of a break up but I’m feeling so bad and guilt as if I’ve ditched him.

Im going to be completely Honest with my reason

I have a much better life with the new guy  plus I can’t forget what my bf put me through all these years ,on top of that his mother didn’t show s slight respect and acceptance .

please tell me if I’m a terrible person . I’m really trying hard not to hurt people

niklo