Hi Anita. Thanks for responding. You hit the nail on the head with the aggression. I do inflict it on myself but it IS my own fault. My fault for not excelling in high school. My fault for being truant more than half of the time in school due to bullying and isolation. I let it affect my education which I regret. *If I Could Turn Back Time – Cher*

My fault for initially going to college but, then leaving simply because it was high school all over again ( without the bullying-more isolation and loneliness, I was shy and quiet ) and couldn’t handle it. 

Yes, I want out of my dead end job which I’ve been in for more than 7 years. Don’t get me wrong it’s gave me lots of experience and knowledge, but I never wanted this in the first place. I’m a social care assistant who works nightshift in a care home. 

Yes I have researched what I need to gain academically as, what I achieved in certain subjects is below average. The thing is, I feel I should* persevere with the healthcare sector because it has possibilities, if I progress academically. Funny fact* I’m fascinated by psychology and human behaviour ( Forensic )

But something’s holding me back.. or I’m just not in the right mindset. Or deep down I know, this isn’t what I want. I just seem to have lost myself over the years and, turning 30 has made me panic about my life and where I’m going/ or what the hell I’m doing. I don’t know what to do. *Lost with no direction – The Climb* Miley Cyrus 

P.s. Excuse the music terms, they just felt appropriate ?