I don’t really know what you mean by monster, what do you mean?

Sorry I forgot to answer this!

What I mean is… I believe I am a very toxic person.

Since I can remember, I have always had overthinking issues. I was always getting into some drama even when I was a little kid – with my family, friends, etc. I wouldn’t let things go.

When I was in college I spent the majority of the time being around my ex-boyfriend. He was very patient and tolerant towards me so we barely had any issues there (well my behavior was still problematic but I was blind to it)… when I started working, I had to face many different people. I started having problems with some, problems which were mostly in my head. And out of habit I’d always run to my ex-boyfriend to rant and get advice from him. I failed to realise that it has gotten worse and worse… in time it was draining him so much that it was exhausting. I was so caught up in all these silly little problems of mine that I also neglected him most of the time, about things that he might be interested in sharing to me for a change.

I know, I am that person. This breakup is actually good for me as it serves as trigger for change and become a better person… my ex-boyfriend truly deserves better though I still cannot help but grief at the loss of him.