Dear beginner25:

Somehow I missed your post of two  days ago. I didn’t understand the question at the  end of your post  from that  day. I  am glad you decided that you will be friends with the  next guy that you will be  considering for a relationship,  getting to know him (and make it possible for him to get to  know you). Maybe you learned  from this last experience, that  for a person to change, it takes way more than the intent to change, way more.

I understand your wondering how can such loving feelings, like you had for this  man,  like what it  appeared he had  for you, how these feelings can go away, and how … unfair maybe, it is for you to be in this position, in the position to have to somehow let go of these  feelings.

These feelings of love are so precious, so deep, so intense. There is so much hope in them, a  hope for a good future, for a happily-ever-after living, that yes, I can see how it seems unfair. And I  suppose it  is unfair.

But it is reality,  and  reality, unfortunately, is often unfair. Wish it wasn’t like it. Don’t we all. And yet, here  it  is, reality. Now  what do  we do? Rebel against  it, kicking and  screaming, hoping it will be different?

anita