Hi Anita,

We started out as friends then he pursued me for 6 months. In that 6 months, I had a series of unstable cycle of tantrums. I mostly react in a negative way (e.g. when he doesn’t message me in a day, I bombard him with a lot of messages or even calls; when I don’t get my way, I throw tantrums; mostly selfish needs). He had to stop because he feels he can’t meet my needs and I deserve a guy who would match my needs. He said he will stay friends with me. I agreed to the setup but I was not really accepting of the friendship setup. I am still hoping he would change his mind and we can resume dating again. During the year he stopped pursuing, I still begged for his attention. I made plans with him even if his schedule would say that he is not sure. I still pushed through.

And recently, I tried making plans again. His answer was he was not sure. I asked him if he still loves me. His answer was “probably but not the way you wanted or thinking”. It made me decide to stop the friendship because it was unfair for myself that I kept treating him more than a friend but he treats/thinks of me as a friend.

As for my mother’s setup, I am happy that I can provide for her. She’s changing and I still give her benefit of doubt. Nothing is set in stone yet.