Dear Laika:

You are welcome.

You wrote: “I’m also wondering if it’s unfair of me to say that I don’t want to wait any longer.. even though I noticed that it reached a point where it’s something that can make me cry”-

It is unfair of you to stay in a situation that makes you miserable. Your first job in life, really, is to make your life as good as possible for you. And so, to accept a life that makes you miserable when you do have an option for a better life is not fair to yourself.

It is fair to him as well that you tell him that you don’t want to wait any longer because it is not to his benefit that you sacrifice yourself, that you give up on what you want so  to please him. It will not be good for him because when we sacrifice ourselves we get angry. We can’t not be angry because we are not meant to sacrifice ourselves. Relationships are meant to be Win-Win, a win for both sides.

“If I do decide to stay, I’m confused as to what my expectations should be and how I can avoid going back to my old habits where I am now and end up feel annoyed again and let it out on him”-

What if you make a list of expectations (a list of any length, it can be short), expectation of him and of you, those you are sure about and those you are not sure about. I will be glad to read your list and give you my input.

(In the next hour or so I will take a break from the computer and will  be back in 16 hours or so afterwards).

anita