Dear Airene:

If you are invested in the fight, then what motivates you is anger, making him finally feel  a little bit of your pain. You were the responsible one, bearing most of the responsibility and the burden while he lived that  “surface stuff”, “funny and social life”. I suppose you want him to realize that and regret leaving you alone with the responsibility and the burden, and maybe.. change his ways?

But he went golfing, so he is winning that fight.

If you wanted to exit the fight you have to not only “say ‘I’m done'”, but be done. By being done I mean accept the injustice of it all, that the marriage was what it was. And then, close the door on it.

anita