Morning Shelby,

Yes you’re absolutely right, my pain has changed. The pain of the trauma I experienced is surfacing and for the first time in months I think I’m slowly but surely allowing it to come over me. I was in absolute bits last night, felt like I couldn’t go in any longer, but I am here and got myself to work this morning, progress.

Right now all I feel towards my ex is anger and a whole load of resentment, I really need to work on the forgiveness thing for my own sake as this is eating me up. I’m just having a really difficult time with this one.

Please understand that pain is all you have known in the last weeks so it is only natural that you are trying to hold on to it to some extent, it is another scary phase to let go of that I find! You loose your identity completely in the process of all of this! By the sounds of it the medication is really helping you so I am happy for you! At least you are no longer suffering with physical pain caused by anxiety!

I haven’t been to the gym since last week, instead I’ve been eating like an absolute pig! Not a great mood lift but hey, I suppose these things come in waves right?

Another day! We’ll get through it!