Thank you, Shelbyville

I woke up this morning and I think I’m still in shock.  My mom has to identify my brothers body today.  Being that he shot himself in the head, it’s going to be beyond horrific for her.

She doesn’t want me to go, which I know that my mental state isn’t strong enough, I don’t want to remember him that way.  I want to remember him the last time we were together.  We went to the mall and spent the whole day together.

I knew he had issues, he was never the same after we lost our dad 2 years ago.

Before he committed suicide he mentioned to me on numerous occasions that he wanted to be with my dad.  I believe that he is.

I don’t know how I’m going to make it through this, I know the worst is yet to come.

I wish I would have went with him when he wanted to go drink, even though I do not drink.

He was in such a rage, I should have known and he would still be alive.