Shelby,

I think it is especially hard for people like us who feel so deeply and also allow a relationship to take over their whole life to then live how to live completely on their own, for themselves and content at that too. Its hard work. I think this one may take a while so don’t beat yourself up too much. Perhaps start off by filling your days with tiny things that you enjoy. Perhaps a favourite song, movie, a hot bath if you enjoy that, a good book. Then make a promise to yourself to push yourself out of your comfort zone in a little while. Perhaps agree to that bar meet with your friends, or go to the cinema with an old friend – push yourself, if you don’t like it you don’t have to do it again for a little while but then choose to push yourself again and again a little more each time.

I completely understand what you’re saying about the family situation being difficult when you reconcile with an ex, particularly if they’ve witnessed you hit the lowest of the low. It’s ineerstandable and I completely understand my dad. But it just leads me to believe that perhaps too much has happened now to ever really properly fix this… maybe we’re just both trying to hold on to some kind of home to regain our old relationship when in reality that died a long time ago and is not something we’ll ever get back..

You’ve got loads to look forward to with Christmas and new year and also the new member of the family arrival fast approaching! Let that be the thing that keeps you going while you figure out the rest!