Dear Jemma:

I will quote from what you wrote in this thread and from your comment to a member on another thread. You wrote: “I have dated very trustworthy people and very untrustworthy people but it doesn’t seem to matter”, you mistrusted all  of them, sooner or later.

“I have a mother that .. instilled some bad habits into me, as she tends to criticize a lot”.

I am guessing your mother betrayed your trust when you were a child, and you felt very angry at her for doing so. Your valid distrust of her projects itself, or gets triggered in the context of your relationships with men (“I feel my blood rising (drunk or not- mostly drunk) .. I am triggered”).

Am I understanding correctly?

anita