Dear afeels:

For an abused person, ending contact with the person doing the abuse is necessary so to start the process of healing and learning, it is only the beginning. Reads like your mother ended contact with her mother but did not engage in the process of healing. This is not uncommon.

It doesn’t mean that her ending contact with her mother was unhealthy, that it damaged her. Not beginning the process of healing kept her stuck  in sickness.

You mentioned your mother’s “pattern of discarding everyone”, does that include discarding you?

anita