Thank you so so much for replying. Not sure where to start. I grew up in a very abusive home. Huge amounts of Domestic violence, verbal and emotional abuse, both parents were Alcoholics,  my father was also a drug addicts. He is in recovery now. Crazy parties. My parents were 18 when they had me and they came from very dysfunctional families too. My parents had men and women in and out of our house. My father left home several times and came back several times. I remember swimming one day and a man helped me learn to swim. I remember him touching me through my swimsuit. Lately because of this new memory My thoughts are very intrusive and overwheming. How/why didn’t I remember this before  now? I am probably not explaining properly. I feel lost and disgusted and horrified. Thank you for replying.