lostcloud,

Stop right THERE! And yet you did become involved and continued to be involved despite that and all the subsequent behaviors.

This makes me wonder about your background. Did you grow up with a father that regularly cheats? Did you feel insecure as a child who did not get the nurturing and attention from your father? Did you have previous failed relationships?

You used the word “investment.” I would reframe that time you wasted with this guy. The only investment you made is in your education of (hopefully) learning about yourself and how you do relationships.

If you need reassurance that you are better off without this person, I suggest you re-read your post.

I see that almost each of us revisit our childhood relationships in order to learn that we need heal from it. I grew up with an angry mother. I keep unconsciously attract angry women (go figure). I know this keeps giving me the opportunity to 1) be aware of my pattern, 2) be more conscious of the women I date, i.e. learn more of their background, 3) deal with their anger “better” so I can learn to set boundaries, be more compassionate and not let that bother me so much.

Mark