Joe,

I totally hear you. As other people have pointed out these are completely normal feelings for your age.

If it’s any consolation people who are “balling” at 18 I’ve found many time were peaking early. By the time they were 30 many of these a-holes had terrible skin and an alcohol or drug problem. By the time they were 40 they were in a miserable relationship if not divorced and looked like hell.

What I got from this is that those who don’t quite fit in, who have to make an effort to find themselves and their community are MUCH better off. You make choices because they are right for you and discover where you should be and what you should be doing. This is a much better life. It’s harder in some respects, but early signs of aging, alcohol bloat, and drama-filled divorces are a lot uglier. Finding your way to a better life will leave you better off. Keep searching.