Dear anita,

yes, honesty is probably the most important quality I am looking for in a possible partner or also in friends. I thought K. was honest, but maybe he was just manipulative… I am tired of him. Hope he leaves me alone now.

Yesterday I talked a little with my therapist about how to change… Hm, I am not sure if I understood and maybe I will have to ask again next time. She said something how I am used to my negative self-image and that we often try to keep everything as it is. And she gave me a book about thoughts and feelings. It seems to be good and talks about managing thoughts and feelings…

Your example makes sense. I can understand what you mean. Hopefully I will be able to change my negative feelings about myself. I think I have already started…

During the last days I felt a little bit better, but I also didn’t enter the community rooms. It just feels better for me to concentrate on myself and my studies. I also painted more and got more work done. Being alone feels more calming to me right now. So I don’t have to worry so much, what others think.

I know, it is not a real solution, more like a band aid… I can see that I absolutely overreacted when people forgot to say hello and such little things. It might mean nothing. What happened I think is this: I was feeling unhappy and insecure because of K. I withdrew myself more and more and got more nervous. After a while, people might have noticed and wondered about me. Maybe they also don’t know how to react to me because I give off such an insecure vibe…

But for now, I prefer to be just by myself. I want to be calm and not have more stress and worries…

I am glad to hear that your leg is fine. And with the sunny weather you can also go for your walks again, right? Here, it is starting to look more and more like spring. You can see plants blossoming and birds with twigs in their beaks… But it is still cool.

Hope you have a good day!