Dear JayMark:

In your original post you wrote about you and your now ex-wife: “neither of us could handle marriage counseling”-

– I think that it is best that the two of you attend counseling now together. In counseling, a competent therapist will facilitate communication between the two of you so  that you will clearly express to her what you want and she will do the same. It is possible that the two of you, currently, are not understanding each other. A competent therapist will help you hear, really hear what she is saying and will help her the same way.

It will help you, her and it will help the three children you share when their parents communicate effectively.

anita