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Dear Nichole:
I am so sorry, Nichole, that you are feeling this badly. I know how it feels to be “on the verge of a breakdown”- but you don’t have to break down, it is not an inevitability. You can be okay, really. Think of it at least as a possibility: you can be okay today. Not okay forevermore, but this evening.
Take slow deep breaths. I think you did the right thing getting an apartment in Chicago because you were not and are not ready to move anywhere else. You have only 12 days to go till you move to your apartment. Like I suggested, it may be okay for you to stay at your father’s/younger brother’s apartment, tomorrow maybe, until the first of August, your move in date.
I will be away from the computer for a short while but will be back to check if you reply in the next hour or so.
anita