Had a short 8 minute call with her before I let her go to see how she’s doing. She’s doing her gardening now then going to hang out with her neighbor for a while that’s turning 40 and really outgoing. Her neighbor started an event where you put hearts on your car and drive out in a train with other cars on the road and honk your horn waving at everyone spreading the love to everyone, so she will be joining her doing that, they also do shopping together often. Also she’s hanging out with her family doing hikes and going in cold water swimming together. I let her go to do her gardening, she said thanks for checking in and that was it. Also her daughter went back home and her 2nd daughter is visiting her for a few weeks, then back home and after her boyfriend should be back.

After I deleted her off my phone and going to try my best with what you said ” just don’t contact her “, so if months go by and she does i’ll just not respond and she will get the hint. I am REALLY jealous she hangs out with her neighbor often for going grocery shopping and other things yet I get nothing, sure I don’t got my license and I don’t live next door and I am an extreme  introvert so I don’t exactly ask to do those things and I live far away but I really don’t feel like I am an important person to her anymore (I am clearly not IMO, used to be) so why bother? I don’t think she WILL message me anymore so nothing lost really. If something happens I’ll post here.

Man what happened to us? relationships really do ruin friendships. I just wanted to see her more then 1-2 times a year, I don’t understand why that’s so hard for her?  how is 1 time a month so hard for her to see me? hell even 1 time every 2 months is SUPER HARD. No problem for her neighbor, family, boyfriend. I must be that repulsive. Same thing with it’s so hard to keep in touch with me…you make time for  people that matter to you, clearly I don’t matter /rant.