Hello Anita,

just to let you know I am presently working through our “talks” so far and summarising.  I feel like a door has opened in the fog but swings back and forth.  The action I need to take with my husband was so clear last year when I separated but then became ever foggier as the contact with him increased.  Now it is becoming clear again.  I am trying to get back my sense of confidence to be able to deal with life alone – which is ridiculous really as he made my life extremely and unnecessarily difficult.  Those lists are painful reminders.  I conclude that I have some pretty powerful denial mechanisms.  I wonder if it what I learned as a child?  I tried to be invisible, read books night and day, and often hid in cupboards to try and escape.  I really need to get on a highway out of this fantasy escape mechanism.  Do you know of any techniques which might help?

Juanita