Ahh doll, he was probably using the push/pull technique on your heartstrings. Immature or underdeveloped men play mind games. I’ve done it myself, you are not to blame, by its very nature these games lead to the woman falling hard without even realising. You see us men usually really do want true love, and down deep we crave companionship and know we would be happier more content and more sexually satisfied if we had a stable, good relationship. The bad news is we are also scared and tend to push real intimacy or commitment away. The root cause of this behaviour is we are full of FEAR and DOUBT.

Men can vary a great deal in just how stuck they are. But the vital question to ask is, “Is he willing to grow? That is, work his way out of his own self-sabotaging pattern?” If a guy is a good person who is attracted to you, self-reflective, working on his issues, and crazy about you, he is a keeper. Once again, no man is perfect. Of course, neither are you. So ask yourself: How much does this man want to have love, that is, love with you in his life? What is he willing to do or change to have that special, lasting experience?” These questions will tell you if it is worth fighting for or moving on.

If he is saying move along after your effort, take his word and leave him. If he has any sense he will do the work and fight. If he doesn’t he has proven to be incapable of change for you. During this time focus on yourself and finding happiness within, you will naturally come out the winner and may no longer want a fixer-upper.

Below are the variants of types of men who push-pull, I’ve copied and pasted to explain to you about their behaviour;

Five deadly dating patterns

1. The savior

He is a super-duper caretaker, a Mr. Fix-It who tries to be romantic too. Your happiness is his happiness. And he doesn’t have much happiness of his own. Underneath it all he is insecure and feels not good enough — so he seems clingy and smothering

Degree of difficulty: 4

If you are firm and he realizes he has to find his own happiness and stand up for himself or lose you, he will step up. Over time he could evolve into a great partner

2. The coward

He is afraid of honest straight talk and very afraid of conflict. If differences come up he pulls away and prefers to communicate by e-mail or texts

Degree of difficulty: 4

Many men have some degree of this pattern. You can breakthrough by using positive talk, where you present your concerns in a loving, warm, and clear way. Once you develop a way to navigate conflict, “the coward” can grow into a wonderful Mr. Right

3.The super romantic flame-out

He is totally on your wavelength and crazy about you from the very first e-mail or glance at your photo. Chances are he is a serial monogamist who has brief periods of being in mad, passionate love with you, then the next, and the next one, following the path of chemistry, wherever it may lead

Degree of difficulty: 8
Take it slow and easy to make him prove himself. If he doesn’t, be ready to bail.

4. The grass-is-greener type

He has a hard time making up his mind, like he is never sure that the job he has is really the best one for him. Online dating has made this pattern very common. Because there is such a smorgasbord of women, men with this inclination are constantly looking to see whether they can do better

Degree of difficulty: 8
If he is very true to type, he will be mortally terrified of “settling” — as in, settling down with you. It is usually best to move on before he does

5. The slacker

He has grand dreams and plans that have been just over the horizon for years. He may be cute and engaging as he passionately describes all that he is going to do. But this is the guy who consistently shoots himself in the foot so that he misses the finish line. He didn’t finish anything — not his degree, his new Web site, his new book, project or the very deal that will get him ahead

Degree of difficulty: 8
Unless he has started to seriously engage in therapy or coaching, you will not be able to rescue this guy. No, not even you

• This reply was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by Tim.