Dear Ashmitha:

You are welcome, and thank you for your kind words. I have some formal educational background, but the value you perceive in my replies to members is there because I am dedicated to my own healing which started in my first quality psychotherapy, 2011-2013, followed by having spent many hours each day, since May 2015, studying members’ developing life-stories, having communicated with individual members for months and years.

“We do have moments where he confides in me and we text for hours but it does not happen very often… he is online a lot…He does have responsibilities in his life as he is the eldest child and works full-time.. from home, due to the pandemic”-

– this is different from what I imagined the situation to be: I didn’t know that (1) he confides in you sometimes, like a friend, (2) sometimes he spends hours communicating with you via text, (3) he has lots of responsibilities and works full-time from home, which explains why he is online a lot, and why he doesn’t have the time to always or often answer your texts sooner than he does.

This means to me that his compartmentalizing you is not extreme (Some compartmentalizing takes place in every person relationships with others).

“Do you think I can do anything to encourage him to communicate with me more?”- to answer this, I ask: you wrote that he confides in you sometimes: what kinds of things did he share with you and how did you respond to him when he confided in you?

anita

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