Morning all, we had breakup sex 3 times throughout, used to really tick me off how casual she was about it, that was one thing I noticed is that we have different views on something as sacred as sex, when I was younger I had a few one night stands and I always ended up feeling not right and some anxiety although it was exciting at the time, now I have the view of I don’t really want to participate unless there is a connection to that person.

Not sure if it’s the tablets or just the fact that time is actually healing now, maybe a combination, they do help with dulling negative thoughts and I’m on my 3rd week now, I just have a feel good factor in particular for not drinking, I identified that as something that was going to make me feel worse and hinder me and I’ve stopped with my own willpower, this is also giving my mind encouragement to do other things that I I wouldn’t previously, that will help me grow.

I actually thought the same about therapy but I still think I will benefit because I suffered from low self esteem and depression before this relationship and I just swept it under the carpet because I could manage my life but wasn’t happy, I just want to get all of my thoughts and history of how I felt and see what the analysis is of that and what I can do to move forward and be at peace with myself.

My friends are respectful of how I’m managing my life at the moment, I’m not someone who can be peer pressured into anything, If I set my mind to something I generally stick to it unless I don’t want to myself, they will always be there if I was to detach from the group for any reason, that happens generally when you get into a relationship anyway and I’ve no guilt if that’s what makes me happy.

I’m glad you liked the message in the bottle idea, for me a heartfelt message would mean a lot more than anything materialistic like trainers etc.

I’m not sure how long I will feel upbeat for but my gp called this morning to see how I was getting on with the medication and she could tell how different I sounded from the initial call and was nice to hear how happy she was about that from her tone, I’m just trying to keep all these little positive points at the top of my thoughts and keep the past ones out.

I’ve got an appointment for my haircut on Thursday evening, I’m think I’m going to have a spruce up at the weekend and update my profile pic, I haven’t done it for over a year so I’m thinking why not!