TeaK,

Thank you! I completely agree with everything you are saying. One thing I do know about myself – I fight change. I think maybe someplace deep down, I KNOW me fixing myself and changing for the better WILL change everything around me. The truth is, there are times I even drink with my spouse as a way of giving in because I’m always fighting about my spouses drinking and how it effects our household and my spouses child. I know the situation is toxic. I know I don’t want this for myself. I know my spouse doesn’t care to stop because he does gets like me so he doesn’t have a problem. But it’s a problem because i see how he misses work and goes on three day drinking missions. Or how he neglects his responsibilities because of drinking. Ugh – this is all such a mess.

I am so glad I reached out today.

Also, I will be attending a meeting later today.