Sorry DC I didn’t mean to imply I was suggesting you continue as a member of the SC. I agreed with Anita on that. Sometimes

I was talking about the idea of detachment and letting go in general.

From what I read your authentic self requires you to speak up when you notice wrong doing, while your anxiety and sleepless nights appear to be attached to the outcome of speaking out.  Begs the question is it possible to be act as our authentic self requires us to act and be detached? The middle way would be to detach oneself from the outcomes (good or bad) as you engage (engagement can involve stepping away). Being still within ones actions…

Not easy… We all have a desire to be ‘seen’ and heard’, which is where healthy boundaries come in and that in this case may require you to step away from the SC and create some space to breath. (Sometimes Love requires a relationship to end)

In this space you may decide to meditate on why and how you take on the police role? I’m not suggesting that your actions are in anyway ‘in the wrong’ only that its a good way to learn things about oneself. Try to do so with out attaching labels to your thoughts or self on the matter.

Each role we play has a time and place as well as various methods. Another question you might ask is if their are ways to engage in the these ‘roles’ that are more successful then others? For example when I attempt the police role in the past I became a ‘hammer that saw every situation as a nail’. Worked great on the situation that really were nails not so much on the ones that weren’t.