Dear anita,

As far as what is going on in the girl’s (young woman’s) brain: I don’t know and neither do you. You know what she told you in the past, but was she sincere about everything that she told you? Plus, just like your moods and thoughts change, so do hers. Therefore, what she sincerely told you in the past may not apply to the present time.. or to the future time.

Yes that’s what i thought too… people could drastically change in 4 years. That’s why i think it’s too risky to wait, and she could also end up meeting someone who she might feel better than me….

Also i’m sure she aims to work in a corporate company when she graduated later on…. And i feel like i don’t wanna lose out to her. But i cant really improve much in terms of career as i’m helping my parents whereas she’ll aim on climbing the ladder in the corporate. I feel like if i can improve how i work, maybe someday if i want her, i can persuade her to live with me….

Because i also imagine a scenario where i can’t find girls im suitable with for the next 4-5 years and maybe i’d try my luck in chasing her again.

Do u think this is a pointless way of thinking? It sounds like i still hope for her is it?

I’ll still try to date other girls, i just feel like there’s no negative impact if i try to make my life better than her…. right?

At that time i’ll be 27-28 years old, it’s not considered old right? I’m a person who’s really afraid of deadlines (i also never do my assignments very close to the deadline day on my uni days as i feel unsafe), and i feel like 30 years old is a deadline, as i’m sure most of my friends would be married by then but at the same time i also don’t want to marry the wrong person due to rush….I experience lots of mistakes due to rush and afraid of not following the pace of my friends. I guess i need to get rid of this way of thinking, because it makes me cant relax…. and comparing other people’s pace with me…

Of course it’s better that you don’t waste time, and that you date other girls.

I can see that you can fall in love with another woman, it’s just the lack of meeting and interacting with young women that are behind your repeated focus on this one girl,

Yes, i really need to find a way for me to interact and meet with young women….
But there isnt much activity in my city here, only badminton and golf… and i’m not good at both of it, also i tend to give up easily if i find things hard. Maybe i should just force myself to do those activities, as there is no other choice?

The only thing I’m doing right now is going to the gym, and i’m not good at it…. My body hasn’t improved at all too…. But at least going to the gym fills my schedule which causes me to overthink less….