Dear Soulglazer:

“I know all we can do is live in the moment but most of the times we’re not really present and wander off with our minds to future or past isn’t that so?“- yes.

I was wondering why sometimes it happens just like that without any effort“- you may be asking why it happens that our minds effortlessly drift from the now to the future or past, or why it happens that we can live in the moment sometimes without any effort and at other times, we can’t. I’ll answer both questions from my experience:

My mind effortlessly drifts to the past and future because of either one or a combination of the following: (1) my mind is in the habit of drifting to the past or future, and habits are strong forces, (2) I seek something- or someone- that does not exist in the present time and place, such as excitement, relief, pleasure, an opportunity to resolve conflict with someone, an opportunity to spend time with someone who will care to listen to me, to understand me, etc., (3) something feels wrong (anxiety, worry, or some kind of pain), so I am looking for the source of the feeling in the past, and solution- in the future.

Sometimes I find myself effortlessly living in the present time and place because I hear a loud noise and attend to it, or I see an amazing sight and attend to it, or I forget about myself and focus on what someone is saying, or I focus on a certain task, like typing these words for you.

“Anyone has any experience on how to reach and maintain such a state?“- yes, figuratively speaking, take the elevator down from your mind (your thinking brain) to your body (your sensing body): from your mind to your ears (listen to the sounds around you), to your eyes (see the images around you), to your skin (sense the feel of the computer keys on your fingers as you type), to your nose (feel the air going through your nose, its hotness or coldness, the smell of it), and/ or to your mouth (feel the warmth of it, the feel of your tongue, taste).

Whenever you drift away from the present (the elevator has gone up and back to your thinking brain) and you want to return to the present… you know what to do.

“I notice when people are around, I often feel uncomfortable…“- because you feel threatened by people perhaps, alert to some danger (?) Most of my discomfort around people was about fearing criticism or ridicule or disrespect in some other way.

anita