Dear Katrine Nielsen:

Asking him for a walk and then talking during the walk or when the two of you sit down after walking, on a park bench or on the grass, may be best. Maybe you can bring with you a couple of sandwiches and something to drink (hot chocolate, let’s say, if it fits the weather) and have a tiny picnic in the park (comfort food and drink may.. comfort the two of you).

“when he said goodbye he called me Kat…  I take that as a good sign“- all the signs indicate that he indeed likes you as a girlfriend. But people are complex, some more complex than others. This is why no one can predict how he will respond to you in the future. I know of a man in real-life who exhibits many signs that he likes a particular woman and wants her in his life, in one way or another, and yet, when he talks about her outside her presence: he insists, loud and clear, that he doesn’t want her in his life at all.

“I will apologize for my behaviour and probably say that I believe that we both like each other but don’t know exactly how to go about it. Or something like that“- I think that it’s a good idea that you apologize for shutting him down in the past: explain to him just a bit why you shut him down (he should identify with your reason, since it’s the same for him), then pause. By pausing, you will be giving him the opportunity to respond. If he doesn’t say anything, or he mumbles something and looks/ sounds very awkward,  talk about something else (birds in the park, people walking by, and/ or pour hot cocoa, etc.), giving him the opportunity to recover from his awkwardness.

When the two of you are calm enough (not too nervous, not too stressed), tell him that you like him very much and that you noticed in his behavior signs that he likes you back, like him calling you Kat. Ask him if he called you Kat because he likes you in a  special way, like you figured, or if you figured incorrectly. What do you think about my suggestions so far?

anita