Hello Anita,

I am really grateful for your reply as you really confirmed my already strong convictions. Unfortunately, I do not have much success in finding a man who respects that.

I believe in friendships before any physical contact. The problem is that men that I’ve met do not want to be friends first and try to kiss me pretty soon. I always refuse the kiss in the first weeks of meeting and it always ends there.

Recently,  I’ve met a new man and he invited me for a coffee. He is a cop. He picked me up from my place and I asked where exactly I would like to go out. I said I prefer if he chooses a place. In that moment he proposed his appartment. I refused and proposed a coffe place on town. Then he said that he can’t show me in public as he is not yet divorced. My heart sunk.

He can only invite me to his place for coffee as his reputation is important for him and people might see us in public. Apparently only 1 week left till divorce.

I did not know how to react. I was really disappointed. I proposed a short walk outside of his building but he insisted to visit him.

After a long convincing and promise that he won’t be forcing me to sleep with him, I went to his place. He seemed nervous and smoked a lot of cigarettes. Did not want to talk too much about his divorce, although I asked a few questions.

Anyways, he tried to touch and kiss me but I told him that it should have a meaning for me and for now it is too fast.

I also added that we can stay friends for now and get to know eachother but he replied that he wants cuddles and fun and that he is afraid of women.

We ended our meeting on a friendly note with a big hug. Then he brought me back home and we parted.

It’s been more than a week and I haven’t heard from him.

I would really appreciate your advice Anita.

What would you do in my situation?

Would you react differently? What should I do next? Is it ok to call or text him now to find out if he got divorced?

Also, I know that when dating we should wait with sex but what about a kiss? Sometimes I feel that I am too strict and overthinking.

Please help me to figure this out 🙏