Dear Helcat,

“I had to practice recalling who he was outside of disagreements and comparing this truth of what I knew about my partner being loving against the almost dark thoughts I experienced during a trigger.”

This is Helpful thank you.

I am not sure if this is a trigger response or what exactly it is but sometimes his jokes make me feel very insecure. We were watching a show this weekend, its a comedy “crazy ex girlfriend,” anyways if you’ve seen it that would be funny. Anyways there’s a scene where this girl is trying to get this guys attention and starts dancing on a stripper pole, it was actually a good dance she did and with confidence, and my boyfriend goes “look at that meatball,” the show is a comedy but still, coming from him made me insecure about my own body. (I am not overweight but I am not skinny) Growing up my family always put a heavy emphasis on being in shape, I thought I overcame this insecurity that I was not a gym model, but it has been resurfacing lately and I got mad at my partner for his comment to which he thought was ridiculous and just a joke. It just made me feel like if I ever looked like her he wouldn’t be attracted to me anymore. There was a very thin yoga instructor in the scene as well I felt he was staring at and it tortures me inside a bit. I truly wish I was more secure than this, feel like I should be and feel embarrassed I don’t have the confidence to overlook it. Should I start another forum about this? I am not sure if this falls under what you relate with..