Dear Seaturtle:

I’ll reply further in the morning, but for now, “Similarly I feel this way about getting my things from N. My roommate tells me to just get it over with. But I feel like I will know when is the right time.. Do you think this is true? … I am afraid about getting my things, but I need my passport from him. I am afraid he will say something to harm me and I feel in too sensitive state to feel it“- I think that much more important than when you pick up your things, is that you do NOT go alone to his place/ to meet him. How about your roommate  going with you.. to get it over with, like she said, when the time is right for you?

“Hm, I had to re-read this out loud to myself to let it sink in. A weakness that comes from the habit formed in trying to compromise it (our crown chakras)  for a parent?“- in many cases, as in mine, a parent is the worst crown chakra predator (CCP)  one is to meet in a lifetime.

Coming to think about it, N- the spider (to the fly,  shark (to the sea turtle), mountain lion (to the deer)- has been your CCP, hasn’t he? And that’s why you sped away from him, prey running away from predator: “I thought I saw him on the freeway today.. I feel like I saw a ghost. He was in the same exact truck as N… I sped ahead as to get a car between us. I truly thought it was him and my heart was beating so fast… it was long enough to scare me“.

Maybe it is more accurate to say that he preyed on your heart chakra, making his way up to your crown chakra?

I get invested in images… But it is true: the people we love, beginning with our parents, are (too often, in so many people’s lives) emotional predators, preying on the ones who love them. The part of us that loves them is the soft flesh they bite into. A sea turtle has a shell for that reason. We must be strong and wise in this strange world of ours.

Good night amazing Seaturtle, be back to you in the morning.

anita