Dear Tee,

Thank you. I hope so too! The whole place was affected and many people and businesses were struggling as well.

Thankfully, I found a place I could use, and the owners were very kind to help.

I’m really happy to hear that you’re managing your health issues much better and don’t give up easily 🙌 and the activities you’re doing sound lovely too!

At the same time I feel really sorry that you can’t participate in the activities that you used to enjoy so much. I feel for you even more as I know how hard it must be. After my last COVID, it got even worst. I’m getting easily tired, out of breath, can’t exercise and no more activities that I used to love.
<p style=”text-align: left;”>I was smiling when you mentioned the flower in my profile picture 😊 you got it right again. I did do a lot of artistic projects in the past and painting was one of my favourites. I used to sit in the nature a lot and just breath. You’re so right that it’s the best nourishment for the soul and we need to go out more often!</p>
Yes, it was a separate session but people seemed to share the information and it did not feel very private. The group wasn’t the patients but the health professionals. You found the right word for this kind of practice “tough love” and it wasn’t a very compassionate & understanding environment. It might be that they meant well and did not want people to feel like victims but the effect was completely different. It did not feel right at all and feelings seemed to be ignored and logic prevailed.

Tee, I will make sure to check the places you suggested for the tramatised animals. My mom’s dog is a COVID baby as she got him around that time. She rescued him and had to pay a lot of money as the place did not want to keep him due to his appearance. He had a squint and was very shy. Nobody wanted him but my mother showed her loving heart and took him. My mother did not give him the proper training as most places were closed during the COVID and he stayed at home most of the time. She did a very beautiful thing but now as he got older it got harder as well.

Oh yes, Tee, that’s the man I am talking about. Please don’t feel bad about being suspicious because it really seems that he had some hidden motives. To be fair to my mother, yes, she did meet him and his kids in person. She stayed at his house (he bought it on mortgage). His ex wife did not contribute anything (his own words). But he said it is better to give the house to the mother of his kids than to any new woman/wife in his life. He also told me that his ex mentioned that she will make sure that no new woman in his life will get anything from him. So they both still have the same rights to the house. That’s why they did not separate financially.

It might be that the divorce was never finalised. He never showed to me the final document although I asked many times. Apparently it got lost somewhere or his ex forgot to send it to him. He got angry and shut me down easily. This could be one option or his ex wife did not want to give up her half or she had no money to buy the half from him. Which one is most realistic?

So my mother stayed for 2 weeks in his house to cook, clean as the kids were small and he could not do much (he did not want to pay for baby sitter or any help). My mother did it for free.

And yes, him and his family (3 sisters) were ultra materialistic and let’s say stingy with money and emotions. But all 3 of them are married to the good, kind and rich men who they really like to boss around and control. But when it came to my fiancé, they controlled his every decision and all decisions I made had to have some benefit to him or his kids. He also did not have a good job and struggled financially when I first met him.

Other than that, he controlled me when I wanted to go out with my girlfriends. He always suspected that I might meet some man better than him. He also told me that he pushed his ex-wife on the coach and she called police 2 times on him. It might be more than he was saying to me. But he blamed her for everything. The official version was that she left the house when he was at work and filed for divorce. He took her passport so she could not leave the country with kids. He never wanted the divorce and convinced her to stay.

They also told me that she had another man before and married my fiancé only for his passport (their marriage was arranged by their parents).

He always spoke about rich people highly and told his kids that poor people have no value in this life. We had some arguments about it but I did not want to play their mother to teach them what is really important in life.

And on top of that he had an obsession about the property and houses. Always wanted to visit people and see how they live and asked if they only rent or own them. I found it strange but thought that it is because his family wasn’t rich.

He saw how my family lived (even my father’s place) as my uncle used to live not far from his place. But it was not enough. My family was curious why there are still no wedding plans but he said it is complicated.

So in the end he said that he can’t marry me civilly but only religiously + common law agreement (cohabitation agreement). He wanted that I sign a document that I give up rights to his house. So basically have no rights at all to anything. I considered signing it as I believed that love will conquer it all but I felt that it could have been a mistake of my life.

After that he told me that if we want to continue our relationship, he wants to visit my mother’s place. I asked him why? If he wanted to see her, she could come over to his place. His version was that he wants to see where she lives, maybe she hides something, that it is not normal to prevent him from coming and she will ruin it for us etc. My mother refused after hearing his conditions and refusal of getting married civilly.

She thinks that religious marriage is not enough nowadays and giving up my rights as a wife is an insult to her and to me. She also asked around and some advisors told her that he was pushing to see her place to make sure that I have a place to go in case of our break up. It would be like an insurance policy for him so I don’t stay at his house. Is that possible? Normally all those conditions are stated in the agreement.

Then he told me that I can’t visit him at his house either until she accepts him in her home. So that was the end of us…

What do you think Tee? Was I right to stop all the contact with him after all that? I still wrote with his daughter but it seems now that she is distancing herself from me as well. What would you do in my place?

The dream is quite a mystery and I don’t really know what the higher power is trying to tell me. Maybe it is a regret? Maybe guilt? Maybe fear that I won’t find anyone better?

Tee, can you please help me to solve it bit by bit? 🕵️‍♀️

Thank you for listening, Tee and for caring to figure this all out! ❤️🙏🤗

Lot’s of love to you and praying for the encouragement on your path to healing 🌹🙏