Hi Anonymous

It is good to hear from you again. 😊

I’m glad that you have the opportunity to let out feelings deep inside and chose to come here and speak to understanding people instead of continuing that search. I will add that we are not qualified to help people and are not a replacement for a therapist. This is why upon hearing about suicidal thoughts, I recommended seeking professional help.

I think having difficulties with identifying unhealthy behaviours and managing boundaries are common difficulties for people with trauma. Trauma itself, especially as a child primes us to accept abuse later on. It is difficult to overcome without professional support.

Never being allowed to make mistakes is rough. That is like being told that you were never allowed to be human. All children do is make mistakes and in doing so they learn and overcome them. Everyone deserves love, compassion and the freedom to make mistakes and learn from them growing up.

I’m sorry to hear that you struggle with self abuse. These things are learned behaviours. Now, you punish yourself for all of your “mistakes”. Just as when you were a child, you don’t deserve it today. Learning to love yourself is a great gift for a trauma survivor.

Love and best wishes! ❤️🙏