Hi

What you’re saying sounds pretty relatable to be honest.

Yesterday I went drinking with my friends and she was going to come with, but she stayed home. I didn’t feel the usual ‘I’m missing you’ feeling I do normal, but I did look around and just think none of these girls are her.

I got back and we had a conversation about how I felt, and it got pretty bad. After a while, she got annoyed and went to sit on the sofa at the Airbnb we’re at. I came to talk and she burst into tears. Suddenly all feeling I had for her disappeared, it was like I didn’t even care for her feelings at all and I knew something was wrong.

I managed to bring myself back to normality and comfort her, I said I want to enjoy the next 2 weeks with her. She says I put too much pressure on this, she doesn’t think that the first person she’s properly with is going to be the one but however long it lasts it’s fun. I had said I’d cheated before and she said I’m the one who called it cheating and we weren’t together, she said she thinks about it sometimes but she was basically saying she didn’t see it the way I do. We went back to bed and cuddled and had great sex and then slept.

I woke up this morning and feel a little numb, I can tell she’s off but it’s early so we can get back to normal with a bit of time. I feel like an awful person for having such conflicting feelings.

I do think there are some deeper issues within myself, it doesn’t make sense that I suddenly lose all feeling for someone I’ve dedicated 6 months of my life to. I only felt that way for 5 minutes but it scared me.