Hi everyone. This is my first time joining something like this and posting in this forum.

I feel very disconnected, sad and broken. I have trouble letting go of things, especially childhood trauma and old wounds. I do not forgive easily, nor myself or other people. I want to release and let go, but I do not know where to start. A year Iago I had some panic attacks for the first time and it was horrible. I know life is trying to tell me to pay attention to my emotional pain but I do not know myself well, I do not know how to listen to myself either. My mom advised that I start with meditation.

I just feel so heavy and like I am carrying so much baggage. I just want to let it go but I do not know how. I do not want to die feeling like I Lost my time trying to make up for old stuff. This emotional pain also has blocked me from showing my true potential in what I love the most which is acting. I get stage freight when in front of people and I am not able to show all my potential. I not bullied because I tried being myself, so I have build this Shell to protect myself from that, from being made fun of. But I want it to go, but it just does not seem to break.