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Grandparent inheriting 18 yr old HS student–who's IN LOVE–HELP

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  • March 25, 2014 at 12:51 pm #53519
    Kua Keys
    Participant

    My 18 year old grandson is coming to live with me. He has lived with me off and on for about 1/2 his life. We have a good relationship. What you might need to know:
    *He’s ADHD
    *He’s flunked this year in Colorado HS, 12th grade.
    *He’ll come here–and go to summer school, HS, whatever it takes…

    *He’s in love for 1st time with smart girl in Colorado, one year younger, one grade below his…
    *They are sexually active–and her parents are okay with this–and she is on 5 year birth control
    *he believes he can’t live without her
    *he’s afraid she’ll break up with him while he’s here

    Why’d he flunk in Colorado?
    *He’s in love, snunk out window to be with GF everynight; then didn’t go to school, didn’t turn in assignments, etc
    *His mom’s been divorcing stepdad for last 8 years of his life–warzone

    Anyone have any ideas as to what I can do to best get him through HS?

    *I’m going to get him counseling
    *Listen to his love-talk and not belittle it
    *Have boundaries with consequences–but calmly
    *Listen listen listen…

    Help?

    March 25, 2014 at 5:24 pm #53530
    Lifelearner
    Participant

    I suggest letting him stay with his mother and not forcing him to move.His fears would likely come true and he would resent you, his mother and himself. help him graduate but let him learn from his own life choices. It might be a great help to go through a online at home school to finish his hs. k12 http://www.k12.com/ is online public school that is free but he would still have to do the work on consistent schedule. ALC http://www.independent-learning.com/distance-program/ is a private school that does distant learning that would likely be more flexible so he would have a easier learning and be able to get his diploma sooner. good luck.

    March 25, 2014 at 6:51 pm #53532
    Kua Keys
    Participant

    His mother has kicked him out over a month ago–she’s been couch surfing. Now’s he’s kicked out of his ‘trade’ program.

    He made the decision to come here–as he feels there are no options there.

    I don’t know if GF will break up with him and neither does he. When I asked him if his feared were based in ‘experience’ or ‘knowledge’ he said, no just fear. And there are no guarantees anyway.

    I have found a community college for ‘adults’ who would earn a HS diploma–not a GED. So that’s good. He will be around students his age and older–a very different set than regular high schoolers.

    I’ll look into online schools—thanks for links!

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