Dear Ellie,

You did understand my question correctly. I guess I couldn’t have worded it better. Yes this was precisely my point and a topic of contemplation ” if he came on here (for example) he would be offered the advice for self forgiveness and self compassion etc? And quite rightly, why should he have the opportunity for that? ”
I personally respect the people that seek forgiveness and the ones that have a heart to forgive. It has been a battle for me for few weeks now. The more I resist thinking about it , the more my thoughts about him persist .
I did try reading, and it helps. I like the idea of adding to the same letter, instead of rehashing everything down. But I also worry that writing my true feelings might lead me to actually send the letter . Which I will probably regret . My subconscious mind knows that the letter is not meant to be send. Perhaps reading it out loud might create that space . I am usually a calm person , but in all fairness I am having hard time accepting the idea that if he were to come here people will tell him to forgive himself and my suffering will have to weight in the end . But thank you for your suggestions, I do a lot of reading and writing, just have to get in a habit stepping out of my mind when I am seeing a downward spiral .

• This reply was modified 10 years, 7 months ago by Zita.