I’m sorry to hear of the breakup of your relationship. I know how difficult that is, as I am still recovering from my breakup six months ago.

What struck me most about your post were these lines: “She wanted some space and that it was nothing to do with me that it was her. She said she didn’t know how she felt and that she might have been trying to fill a void with our relationship.” As hard as it is, I think you need to take this to heart. In these words, she is telling you that regardless of if you want to get married and have kids, she still has things to work out within herself before she can be in any kind of romantic relationship with you. So even if you’re willing to forsake marriage and kids, she needs space.

I, too, invested in a relationship with a married/separated person. Our relationship started quickly as well and it was everything I thought I wanted. It ended up being a very difficult road to go down with the subsequent divorce and custody battle over the kids. I saw red flags in the beginning, but I was blinded by my infatuation/love for this man. My intuition told me he would need time to recover emotionally from the end of his marriage, but he insisted up and down that he never was in love with her, that he and I had an incredible connection, that I was “the one”, etc. In your case, she is telling you she needs time and space to heal. Whether she loves you or not is sadly not going to change the fact she needs to find closure in her marital situation. Is she moving toward divorce or could there possibly be a reconciliation? In my opinion, two years is a long time to be separated with no movement one way or the other. But of course, every relationship is unique.

I’m sorry for your pain. It’s trite, but I do believe that if it’s meant to be, she will find her way back to you. Give her time and space to find her way.