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Dear Jobebee,
You are doing very well processing all the thoughtful feedback. What you are going through is very hard, and as you can see there are answers for you.
I’d like to add one other personal point of experience that may help you. When I became upset enough in an abusive relationship, that I was trying hard to make work, that I went to see a psychologist, within the first 5 minutes of meeting me, he asked, “What if you move out?” I did move out before the follow up session. Since then I have been single and over time I became more and more healthy and strong. It’s a journey for sure, but I would be in really bad shape had I not moved out. Just my story. Priceless to me. Take it for what it may or may not be worth to you.
Big blue