I want to be honest, but what is the truth? My wires seem to be crossed. I don’t feel physically attracted to her, but I’m jealous of her being attracted to someone else. I feel anxious when she’s around, but miss her when she’s gone. I don’t feel worthy of her devotion and yet I can’t seem to return feelings of gratitude and love.

Taking some time away to see the parents might be a good idea, but it feels like running away and avoiding my problems. Though, I will consider it seriously.

All of this feels eerily familiar and a nasty pattern of thought and action that’s repeating itself. It has to stop. I can’t keep doing this to myself and others.