MaRia,

Many of us have a history that is uncomfortable to share, and with your prodding, its no wonder that he felt afraid to be honest!

Consider most of the issue seems to come from this shock that two people had sex. Partly because the roles are less typical, age differences, crossing of parent/child friendships. Even so, so what? Can you accept that your prince has some cracks on his leather saddle? Said differently, are anyone’s past choices pristine? Then why bother holding onto it?

Another way of approaching this is to think about what you’re actually doing, here and now. Your mind is kind of spinning, yelling at people for having a past that is disagreeable to you, not what you want it to be. This prevents it from being simple. For instance “why did that happen?” “I don’t know, seemed fun, didn’t last, moved on…” “ah, want to rub my shoulders? This topic unnerves me, I could use a hand or two.” Why let it stand between you two? Why grab the whip? Why lash? Why build a wall? He shared some dances with unlikely maidens before finding his princess… but don’t we all?

With warmth,
Matt